Although I am not skilled to understand why or how certain events happen, I do know that this is all part of God's special plan. I find comfort in believing God's plan, but it certainly does not make it easy to experience it. One of the reasons I began blogging was to have an outlet so that I can channel my emotional roller coaster of a life. Well, let me just say the roller coaster isn't stopping anytime soon. I honestly try to see the good in every situation. While my mom has made extreme improvements in her physical and mental health, She is still forced to battle the original challenge, Cancer. I hate cancer. Yall, I really really hate it. Mama has suffered through so many obstacles, and she is nothing less than a walking miracle. She amazes me everyday. Three whole months ago she was in a coma, struggling to live. Today, she is cooking Sunday dinner, and if it is even possible, i'm pretty sure her cooking is back better than ever! and so the Sunday dinner ritual continues!
Because she no longer needs healthcare assistance, we are over the moon excited that she is HOME! We pray that she continues to progress as she falls back into her everyday way of life. Because she had many other health issues to control, cancer and chemotherapy treatments were kind of on the back burner. Well, now that she's well, Daddy took her to her oncologists last week and we received bad news. In October we received good news that her tumor had shrunk by 30%, well now it is getting larger. We don't know how much larger. I mean seriously, how much bad news can one woman take? I truly can't imagine how she feels, but I all know to do is just love her as hard as I can. My heart hurts. so bad. She is on my mind every minute of the day, and I feel so helpless. My daddy is still her stronghold and is there for her every step of the way. Because chemo is no longer an option, it appears the only other option is to remove the tumor. Originally when she was diagnosed, she thought surgery was the worse case scenario. Now, she believes chemo is almost worst than cancer itself. She doesn't really talk about it much, and I can see how terrified she is when we do talk about it. And the truth is, I am scared too. I have faith in God's Will for our lives, but I am truly scared that she won't be pleased with the outcome. And so the saying goes, "when Mama aint happy, nobody's happy." As her family, we will be there for her no matter what. Prayer is such a powerful thing, and I do not take it lightly. However, sometimes I feel as though I'm praying for the wrong miracle. I just want her to be happy, I want her to know just how much she is loved by her family, friends, and community. I know that Mama has an abundance of prayer warriors out there. Please continue to lift her up in prayer. And also my Dad. He's such a strong man, but he needs a little lovin' too. :)
It's true, I have the greatest parents in the world who have taught me endless life lessons on how to love, live, and be a positive influence. I am so very blessed.
Sunday, January 13, 2013
Tuesday, January 8, 2013
a merry little Christmas
Christmas festivities kicked off in full force. Just like every year, the week before Christmas just sneaks up on me and all the sudden I have three parties to attend (all in the same night), outfits to buy, presents to wrap and just not enough time to do it all in! Because this year was supposed to be a stress-free year, I made an extra effort to take a deep breathe and not overdo myself with my obligations.
So it all began when Jonathan and I got a hint of Christmas Spirit and set up our tree and decorated our house with white lights. We always decorate a little bit, perhaps some garland around the front door, but this year we went all out. Complete with two Christmas trees on each side of the house (for symmetrical purposes) and lights on the porch. Only one confession, neither of my tress are actually decorated. BUT the lights sure look great from the road! :) This house has never seen so much light, and I love it! Pictures never really give credit to the beauty of Christmas lights, but we can try, right?
And then the Christmas parties began. Between Jonathan and I, we were booked with Party invites. We weren't able to attend all of them, but we certainly tried! Unfortunately, I only have pictures from one, and it just so happens to be a tacky sweater party. The party was at our friends John and Jenny Juneau's house. And boy, was it tacky! Just to enlighten you, Nathan wore green tights. Enough said. Such a fun party with great company, food and laughs! (and maybe even a little egg nog) :)
Not only is the week before Christmas crazy busy, but it's also Jonathan's birthday!! And let's just be real honest, yall know I love a birthday! December 22nd is the big day for J-Man and I try and go all out for him. He never asks me to, and he never wants to make a big deal for celebrating his day of birth, but because it is so close to Christmas I want to set aside that day to not be in the mix of the holiday bustle. Jonathan is such a warm, loving and inspiring person. I am so very glad he was born. I thank God everyday for our marriage and friendship and the love we share. I plan on sharing many many more birthdays with this man, so Jonathan buckle up (if you haven't already in the past 9 years, you are about feel the birthday love!!)
This year for his birthday we were able to go to the Cowboys vs. Saints game in Dallas! WHAT AN AWESOME TIME!!! Most people that have ever had a conversation with Jonathan knows three things about him from the get-go. He plays soccer, he has a huge heart, and he is a die-hard cowboys fan. He grew up rooting for the cowboys, and the man knows more about that franchise than should be possible. He isn't always the greatest sport when the Cowboys are in play, but he is the definition of a true fan in any circumstances. We made the trip to Dallas early Sunday morning with our good friends Betsy and Becca. We were so anxious to get there, we arrived at 9:00 am for the noon game! I can't tell yall how much fun we had! Even though our Cowboys didn't pull out the win, the game was such a great one to experience! It was the perfect day to celebrate Jonathan's birthday!
and then just like that it was Christmas Eve! Whaattt?? We stayed in Shreveport Sunday night at Jonathan's Dad's house. I woke up early the next morning (feeling the extra weight from gameday food) and attempted to run. Well, I ended up running 8 miles! Whoa! Especially since I haven't run more than 4 miles in months!! But it was Exhilarating and such a beautiful day! Later that day, Jonathan and I went to his Mom's house to celebrate Christmas. We had a great time catching up, re-living our Dallas trip, and opening gifts! We jetted back to Ruston just in time to make the Christmas Eve service at The Bridge. It was a beautiful candlelight service, and the perfect kick-off to celebrate Jesus' birthday. We then head to Uncle Glenn's house for a family gathering. In my previous post i mentioned my childhood memories of attending Aunt Ann's Christmas Eve party. In the past few years, this has migrated to Uncle Glenn's house, and just as fun as ever! This is a big deal because this is also Mama's first social outing. and she did Awesome!! I was so very glad she was able to spend these moments with us. She was socializing, laughing, holding babies, just like normal! Praise God for her healing progress!
So Christmas Day was quite the dreary day, but it didn't hold us back any! Jonathan and I were extra lazy (normally I don't condone this type of behavior, ;) but man I was tired from the previous week!) Robin and Stacy and their families were in Ruston by 2:00 that afternoon. And just like that, everyone was together feelin' the Christmas love. After some snacks and socializing... the games broke out and things got serious. Let's just say I have a ..umm...a competitive family. I am usually the one that is losing, and I get my feelings hurt, blah blah... BUT this day was different. Anyone ever played Cranium?? let's just take a moment to appreciate that Jonathan and I won. probably the first time ever! I will hold these reigns until the next time I sorely lose :)
After our massive and AMAZING dinner, we gathered around and listened to the kids read the bible. There is something special about children reading the Christmas story that is very touching. Then Daddy orchestrated that each adult take turns and talk about your favorite childhood Christmas memories. This is something new for our family, because let's face it, we just want to cut straight to opening presents! But like I explained in a previous post, things were going to be different this year. Our focus was on family, and celebrating Jesus, rather than the abundance of left over wrapping paper. And we accomplished just that. We probably sat around for 2 hours discussing our favorite memories. And let me tell you, things got emotional up in the Scriber household. We laughed and cried, and truly enjoyed each other. No cell phones, no television, just us. I just love my family so much. Many of you know how much our family has had to overcome, but with God's love and the love we have for each other, I am blessed. I can literally FEEL the love we have in the room. My favorite part of the day was when we gave Mama her gift. Robin organized for us to make her a personalized quilt. Each of us, including the kids, designed a quilt square and then we had it made into a blanket for her to take where-ever she goes. She was so very touched when she opened it. I don't think I have ever seen her this full of emotion and happiness. Each square was a personal touch to what she meant to us. Also, giving her hope and inspiration to believe that God still has her in our lives for a reason. Although she is the most courageous and loving person I know, I also believe she finds it difficult for her to believe it sometimes. Our prayer is that she never gives up, and knows that we are always here for her. And now, with our handmade quilt, she can literally feel us around her at any time.
I pray that one day I will look back and be able to tell the Christmas memory of 2012 and what a perfect, beautiful day is was.
So it all began when Jonathan and I got a hint of Christmas Spirit and set up our tree and decorated our house with white lights. We always decorate a little bit, perhaps some garland around the front door, but this year we went all out. Complete with two Christmas trees on each side of the house (for symmetrical purposes) and lights on the porch. Only one confession, neither of my tress are actually decorated. BUT the lights sure look great from the road! :) This house has never seen so much light, and I love it! Pictures never really give credit to the beauty of Christmas lights, but we can try, right?
And then the Christmas parties began. Between Jonathan and I, we were booked with Party invites. We weren't able to attend all of them, but we certainly tried! Unfortunately, I only have pictures from one, and it just so happens to be a tacky sweater party. The party was at our friends John and Jenny Juneau's house. And boy, was it tacky! Just to enlighten you, Nathan wore green tights. Enough said. Such a fun party with great company, food and laughs! (and maybe even a little egg nog) :)
Not only is the week before Christmas crazy busy, but it's also Jonathan's birthday!! And let's just be real honest, yall know I love a birthday! December 22nd is the big day for J-Man and I try and go all out for him. He never asks me to, and he never wants to make a big deal for celebrating his day of birth, but because it is so close to Christmas I want to set aside that day to not be in the mix of the holiday bustle. Jonathan is such a warm, loving and inspiring person. I am so very glad he was born. I thank God everyday for our marriage and friendship and the love we share. I plan on sharing many many more birthdays with this man, so Jonathan buckle up (if you haven't already in the past 9 years, you are about feel the birthday love!!)
This year for his birthday we were able to go to the Cowboys vs. Saints game in Dallas! WHAT AN AWESOME TIME!!! Most people that have ever had a conversation with Jonathan knows three things about him from the get-go. He plays soccer, he has a huge heart, and he is a die-hard cowboys fan. He grew up rooting for the cowboys, and the man knows more about that franchise than should be possible. He isn't always the greatest sport when the Cowboys are in play, but he is the definition of a true fan in any circumstances. We made the trip to Dallas early Sunday morning with our good friends Betsy and Becca. We were so anxious to get there, we arrived at 9:00 am for the noon game! I can't tell yall how much fun we had! Even though our Cowboys didn't pull out the win, the game was such a great one to experience! It was the perfect day to celebrate Jonathan's birthday!
So Christmas Day was quite the dreary day, but it didn't hold us back any! Jonathan and I were extra lazy (normally I don't condone this type of behavior, ;) but man I was tired from the previous week!) Robin and Stacy and their families were in Ruston by 2:00 that afternoon. And just like that, everyone was together feelin' the Christmas love. After some snacks and socializing... the games broke out and things got serious. Let's just say I have a ..umm...a competitive family. I am usually the one that is losing, and I get my feelings hurt, blah blah... BUT this day was different. Anyone ever played Cranium?? let's just take a moment to appreciate that Jonathan and I won. probably the first time ever! I will hold these reigns until the next time I sorely lose :)
After our massive and AMAZING dinner, we gathered around and listened to the kids read the bible. There is something special about children reading the Christmas story that is very touching. Then Daddy orchestrated that each adult take turns and talk about your favorite childhood Christmas memories. This is something new for our family, because let's face it, we just want to cut straight to opening presents! But like I explained in a previous post, things were going to be different this year. Our focus was on family, and celebrating Jesus, rather than the abundance of left over wrapping paper. And we accomplished just that. We probably sat around for 2 hours discussing our favorite memories. And let me tell you, things got emotional up in the Scriber household. We laughed and cried, and truly enjoyed each other. No cell phones, no television, just us. I just love my family so much. Many of you know how much our family has had to overcome, but with God's love and the love we have for each other, I am blessed. I can literally FEEL the love we have in the room. My favorite part of the day was when we gave Mama her gift. Robin organized for us to make her a personalized quilt. Each of us, including the kids, designed a quilt square and then we had it made into a blanket for her to take where-ever she goes. She was so very touched when she opened it. I don't think I have ever seen her this full of emotion and happiness. Each square was a personal touch to what she meant to us. Also, giving her hope and inspiration to believe that God still has her in our lives for a reason. Although she is the most courageous and loving person I know, I also believe she finds it difficult for her to believe it sometimes. Our prayer is that she never gives up, and knows that we are always here for her. And now, with our handmade quilt, she can literally feel us around her at any time.
I pray that one day I will look back and be able to tell the Christmas memory of 2012 and what a perfect, beautiful day is was.
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